CATEGORY:Emotional Intelligence

To survive a crisis and win, we need to master the “Five Weapons To Deal With The Post-Pandemic World”.

Rajat and Lynn knew about the Five Weapons.

Rajat ignored them.

Lynn honed them.

Storm On The Horizon

News item in September 2019 : Oil prices dip below US$ 40 per barrel

News item in December 2019 : IEA predicts flattening of global energy demand

Viral blogpost in December 2019 : China doctor arrested for posting video on ‘runaway virus’

News item in January 2020 : Wuhan locked down; virus rampages across region

News item in February 2020 : Thousands infected in Italy; virus sweeping into Europe

Having Sight, But No Vision

Rajat Chandra was a lucky man.

He had had a comfortable career so far. In his mid-thirties, Rajat was the Operations Manager in a reputed Maritime Services group headquartered in Singapore. He had just completed 5 years in the company, and was well thought off, by his management and his team-mates.

Rajat was good at his job, and knew enough to deliver steady outcomes. He was happy – he felt secure and stable.

A few months before, in November, the Managing Director nominated middle managers in Rajat’s company to attend a two day training seminar on career management. Run by two former CEOs, who were now professional coaches, the seminar addressed various career issues and concerns. One of the sessions was on the Five Weapons professionals needed to survive a crisis and thrive in the corporate world.

The session described and discussed the Five Weapons –

1. Situational Awareness
2. Flexibility & Mobility
3. Networking
4. Strategy & Planning
5. Continuous Learning

Rajat had enjoyed the seminar. He found the ‘Five Weapons’ session stimulating and fun, and the examples, both from historical and from current times, interesting.

But he also felt that he did not really need these weapons. The combination of security and stability had given birth to new feeling – complacency.

Famous Last Words

“Why would I need weapons?” Rajat thought. He was part of a good company, where the leadership took care of and invested in the employees. And, he was doing well, and had been promoted a year ago, and was hoping for another promotion within the next couple of years. He got along with his boss, and his numbers were looking good.

“These Five Weapons are more for executives and managers who are either in companies not doing well, or who are not doing so well themselves,” Rajat thought. In fact, he had shared this opinion with one of his colleagues  (and a good friend) Lynn Cheng.

“I don’t agree,” Lynn had replied, after hearing Rajat out. “I think all of us need to master these weapons. We have no control over the external environment, but we can prepare ourselves for the worst case scenario so that we can survive a crisis.”

Rajat had laughed. “Lynn, what worst case scenario? You know I read about global economics and finance all the time – the world is doing well, in fact never better! Why would I spend time mastering things I am never going to use?”

Lynn was insistent. “No, Rajat, those two CEOs were not fools. They did not sacrifice one-fourth of the seminar to focus on things that we would not need. Did you know that this is a newly incorporated session? They evidently see something we don’t.”

“No way,” Rajat scoffed, “We are doing great, and nothing is going to change that!”

Prepare For The Unexpected

Lynn Cheng had also had a nice life so far.

She was 31 years old and was Deputy HR Manager. She had been with the company for a little longer than Rajat. Lynn had started as an HR Officer, and had been promoted thrice in six years. She was that rare HR professional – trusted and liked by her colleagues.

Lynn was different from Rajat in one critical aspect. She knew that security and stability could be unpredictable and transient.

Lynn was completely energized by the career management seminar. Every session spoke to her, resonating with her own thoughts and opinions.

When she was younger, her father once quoted the then CEO of Intel, Andy Grove, to her :

“Success breeds Complacency. Complacency breeds Failure. Only the paranoid survive.”

The day after the seminar, Lynn started her journey to mastering the Five Weapons.

The Warrior’s Path

She first tackled Situational Awareness.

Lynn broke it into three parts – her company, her market and the general environment.

She read as much as could find about her company’s history, growth and performance. What she couldn’t find, she asked of her boss and colleagues. She spent some time with the CFO and understood the financial issues and stresses that the company was facing.

Lynn subscribed to various domain newsletters on the maritime sector. As she pored through these, she realized that the maritime industry was in bad shape. Hundreds of companies had closed down in the past few years, and even the remaining ones were financially teetering.

Then, she started browsing the internet on global issues – the increasing nationalism, the trade war between US and China, the struggles of emerging economies, the failures in world trade and cooperation.

Within two weeks, Lynn fully agreed with Andy Grove – “In such an environment, one definitely needs to be paranoid,’ she said to herself, “I will need to master the Five Weapons if I want to survive a crisis.”

Within four weeks, she realized that neither her nor Rajat’s jobs could be taken for granted. One misstep here or one change there, and the company would need to cut costs drastically.

In parallel, Lynn started planning her Strategy (and upgrading her Learning).

In her reading, she also learnt about the forces that were disrupting HR. During this, Lynn had come across a McKinsey article on how 40% of HR jobs in the future would be done by computers and bots. She agreed with the article – “Much of what we do is repetitive and patterned,” she thought, “So easy to digitalize.”

She realized that some parts of HR – talent management, performance management, employee engagement – would be difficult to offshore or digitalize. “If I want to continue in HR and survive a crisis, I will need to become an expert in these areas,” she said to herself.

Lynn looked for and joined two HR professional forums so that we could keep track of the state of the art and find avenues to learn and develop herself.

She visited a career counselor. “What areas, other than HR, can my current capabilities and competencies help me excel in?” she asked.

Lynn had always been good at Networking.

Now, she bumped it into high gear. Within 6 weeks, she had got to know and interact with more than 50 managers and leaders in the HR world through the forums.

A close friend advised her to develop her social media profile. With some help, she started writing a weekly blog on HR issues and inviting her friends, colleagues and acquaintances to contribute and engage.

Lynn also started a new initiative – she started calling on and meeting with HR and non-HR managers in the various organizations in her building. There were more than a 100 companies, and she planned to build at least one relationship in each company in the next 6-7 months.

Finally, Lynn evaluated her personal situation, to see how Flexible she really was. 

She totaled up her assets, calculated her monthly outgo, spoke to her parents about their needs, consulted a wealth manager friend. Lynn quickly learnt that she had not given her own financial security enough priority in the past. Being flexible, she realized, was to a large extent, an outcome of being financially independent.

Lynn calculated that she had enough to sustain herself for about 9-12 months. But that was not sufficient. To be able to survive a crisis, she needed to be able to sustain at least 24-26 months.

She sat with her (newly appointed) wealth manager and put in place a new approach. Together, they laid out specific goals to achieve and decided on a savings and investment plan to reach this soon. She also enlisted for an online course in personal investing.

By March 2020, Lynn was well on her way to achieving most of her milestones, if not her goals. She felt much more confident that she could survive a crisis now, but did not allow herself to become complacent.

Tragedy Strikes

On 15 April 2020, both Rajat Chandra and Lynn Cheng received notices of termination with immediate effect.

“The Company is unable to sustain its current operations, and regretfully needs to seek judicial protection,” said the letters.

Rajat was shocked and flabbergasted.

Lynn was saddened. But not surprised.

You Shall Reap What You Sow

Today, four months later, Rajat is at home, applying for jobs. His savings are gradually running out. He now suffers from hypertension and is on medication.

Meanwhile, Lynn is Talent Management Specialist in one of the top e-commerce companies in the world. She earns 30% more than what she did previously.

Lynn is not resting, however. She continues to hone her Five Weapons.

1. Situational Awareness
2. Flexibility & Mobility
3. Networking
4. Strategy & Planning
5. Continuous Learning

Lynn knows that success is never final. That she has to be armed and ready for the next shock, the next upheaval.

Lynn is not just a survivor. She is a winner.

As you can be, if you master the Five Weapons…

****

If you are more Rajat than Lynn, start learning how to wield the Five Weapons NOW. If you are more Lynn than Rajat, help me share these principles with your colleagues and friends, so that they may prepare themselves before it is too late. 

Do send your inputs to me, either as a comment or as a PM.

Cheers | Shesh | Singapore | 11 August 2020.

Post Script :

1. For other interesting CEO Chronicles click here.
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A lesson from a cockroach

In #ceochronicles article 22, we began our discussion on Emotional Intelligence (and Emotional Quotient or EQ). We met Peter and Paul and saw how differently they reacted to the same situation. We discussed the definition of Emotional Intelligence (EI) and how this quality can change our lives for the better.

While I was reading about EI and EQ, I came across this brilliant extract from a speech by Mr. Sundar Pichai, CEO of Google, which I thought you would love!

To Scream or Not To Scream?

At a restaurant, a cockroach suddenly flew from somewhere and sat on a lady.

She started screaming out of fear.

With a panic stricken face and trembling voice, she started jumping, with both her hands desperately trying to get rid of the cockroach.

Her reaction was contagious, as everyone in her group also got panicky.

The lady finally managed to push the cockroach away but …it landed on another lady in the group.

Now, it was the turn of the other lady in the group to continue the drama.

A waiter, hearing the commotion, rushed forward.

In the relay of throwing, the cockroach next fell upon the waiter.

The waiter stood firm, composed himself and observed the behavior of the cockroach on his shirt.

When he was confident enough, he grabbed it with his fingers, walked to the door and threw it out of the restaurant.

Sipping my coffee and watching the amusement, the antenna of my mind picked up a few thoughts and started wondering, was the cockroach responsible for their histrionic behavior?

If so, then why was the waiter not disturbed?

He handled it near to perfection, without any chaos.

It is not the cockroach, but the inability of the ladies to handle the presence of the cockroach that disturbed the ladies.

I realized that, it is not the shouting of my father or my boss or my wife that disturbs me, but it’s my inability to handle the disturbances caused by their shouting that disturbs me.

It’s not the traffic jams on the road that disturbs me, but my inability to handle the disturbance caused by the traffic jam that disturbs me.

More than the problem, it’s my reaction to the problem that creates chaos in my life.

The Cockroach Theory

I understood that I should not react in life.

That I should always respond.

The women reacted, whereas the waiter responded.

Reactions are always instinctive, whereas responses are always well thought of, just and right to save a situation from going out of hand, to avoid cracks in relationship, to avoid taking decisions in anger, anxiety, stress or hurry.

How does Emotional Intelligence help?

Just as Peter’s EQ helped him keep calm and thoughtful, so did the waiter’s. Both of them rose above the situations they were in and took actions that benefited not just themselves but everyone around them.

Emotionally intelligent employees are dependable and reliable.

They look at the whole picture and act with thought and planning.

Such employees understand not just their own needs, but the needs and requirements of others around them.

They recognise that ‘no man is an island’ and put their team or community ahead of themselves.

By doing all this, they build an amazing reputation. People respect them. Organisations recognise them as leaders. People look to them in times of crisis.

Having a high EQ sets you apart and puts you ahead.

How do I become Emotionally Intelligent?

The 8 steps to becoming Emotionally Intelligent are :

1. Understanding your emotions and tapping into them

We rarely try and understand our emotions. Most often, we ignore them or suppress them. But when we ignore our feelings, we are overlooking an important and integral part of ourselves. Our emotions have a huge effect on our mindsets and behaviours.

We need to start understanding our feelings and connecting them to our experiences.

For example, when we are at work and we hear that a colleague has bad-mouthed us. What emotions arise when this happens? Or, when we are praised for completing a project on time. What exactly do we feel? Naming our emotions – sadness, embarrassment, joy, contentment, etc., will help us understand how we react to different situations and stimuli, and help us understand ourselves better.

2. Seeing the links between your emotions and your behaviour

The next step is to understand the impact of emotion on our behaviour. How do we react when we feel a particular emotion?

Do we withdraw when we are embarrassed? Or do we become belligerent?

Do we raise our voices when we are angry, or do we walk away to be alone?

Do we cry when we feel hurt or do we try and take it out on someone else?

The more we understand what emotion causes which behavioral impulse, the better we will be able to actually control and change our behaviour to our advantage.

3. Accepting yourself

Often, we don’t like our emotions. As often, we don’t like ourselves when we are emotional.

All our emotions are valid, even the negative ones. Every emotion we have is a new piece of useful information connected to something that’s happening around us. Without this information, we will not know how to adequately respond to different situations – we will only react.

I have personally found it very difficult rationally evaluating and accepting my emotions. For many years, I have practiced letting negative emotions surface and connecting them to what is happening around and to me. By doing so, I have learnt my ‘hot buttons’ and ‘triggers’. Today, I am better equipped to know what emotion triggers which reaction in me, and to consciously try and plan my response.

4. Planning your behaviour

We cannot control the emotions we feel, but we can decide how we respond to them. If I have an issue with lashing out in anger or shutting down when I am hurt, and I know this, I can start planning how I should behave differently. The next time I am angry, I recognise this and I say to myself – from past experience I have learnt that lashing out only makes things worse; let me take a walk for a few minutes and calm down and then come back and respond with a cooler mind.

By understanding our emotions and our past behaviour patterns, instead of letting our emotions overwhelm us, we can decide how we will behave.

So when something negative happens in our life, let us take a moment to feel our emotions. Once the initial wave has passed, let us make a conscious decision to communicate our feelings in a calm manner, rather than lashing out or walking out.

5. Knowing what you want and why you want it

Much of the time, our reactions are an outcome of ignorance. Often, when we are faced with situations or events, we don’t know what we want the outcome to be. This is because we don’t know what we want and why.

When I was younger, I would get enraged when people did not listen to my ideas. This would lead to my becoming increasingly aggressive, which would then push people even further away.

After years of introspection, I realised that one of my innermost needs was to be seen as innovative. I realised that when people did not heed my ideas, I felt rejected. Gradually, I realised that this was not their fault, but mine. Over time, I modified the intensity of this craving. As this happened, I realised that when I began placing my ideas on the table without desperation or aggression, they had a much better chance of being accepted.

The more we understand our needs and desires, the better we are able to manage the way we communicate and respond.

6. Learning to open your mind

Being open to ideas and inputs is a critical aspect of EQ. When our minds are open through understanding and internal reflection, we find it easier to deal with conflicts in a calm and self-assured manner.

Often, even today, I find myself believing that there is only one ‘right’ way to do certain things. The moment I believe this, I have narrowed my mind. I find myself rejecting any new inputs or ideas, and getting angry and frustrated when others don’t accept ‘my way’.

Every time this has happened, it has led to unhappy outcomes. By keeping our minds open, we find ourselves more socially aware and open to new possibilities. We are more receptive and understand others better, leading to better and more agreeable outcomes.

7. Understanding others and recognising how they feel

An important aspect of EQ is to be able to recognize how other people are feeling. To do this, we need to ‘listen actively’, really paying attention to what people are saying, to their body language, to their microexpressions. The more we understand their feelings, their reactions and their mindsets, the better our interactions and communication with them.

To improve our empathy, we need to put ourselves in other people’s shoes. We need to think about how we would feel if we were in their situation. We need to imagine how it must be to go through the experiences they are encountering and what might alleviate some of their hardship in terms of support and care.

Empathy allows us to be truly interested in what people are saying, so that we can respond in a sensitive and helpful way, thus adding value to them in their time of need.

8. Measuring the impact of your behaviour on others

And finally, we need to understand our effect on the people around us. Do we make people happy? Or do we make them nervous? Are we inclusive? Or do we exclude?

We need to identify these patterns. Do I tend to pick fights with my loved ones? Do people tend to close up a bit when I am around? If so, I need to change my attitude, approach and behaviour so that I can have a better emotional effect on people.

I try and ask my family and trusted friends what they think about my impact on them and their feelings. I ask them to tell me the areas I need to improve in. (This list is long and is a work in progress!) By doing so, I am able to gradually improve the impact of my behaviour on their lives.

The Eight-Fold Path…

Being Emotionally Intelligent is more than about doing well in your career.

Having a high EQ makes you more positive, more accessible, more likeable and more reliable.

I hope you are able to use these eight steps to find your path to a life full of contentment and satisfaction and inner peace.

****

If you believe your EQ stands apart, pat yourself on the back, click like and comment, “YES!”.  If you do not believe so, let’s start our journey together today.

Cheers | Shesh | Singapore | 03 March 2020.

Post Script :

1. For other interesting CEO Chronicles click here.
2. Follow me so that you don’t miss the next issue of CEO Chronicles.

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